Seriously...SIT DOWN!
It's a Girl - I guess that would be what I would want to hear. Especially after my miscarriage November 2005. Would I like to have a baby? "Yes"! A HEALTHY little girl or boy to call our own. (Note -I did not say to call "my" own.)
But, as it stands right now, it doesn't look like God has that planned for ME/us (SEE BELOW).
Jump forward to Feb 2007. Jim receives a letter in the mail. A letter from a 16 year old girl named Caitlin. A 16 year old who just found out her father's name is Jim.
Hey! I warned you to SIT DOWN.
I'm still reeling about the news. And honestly, it does hurt. At times it breaks my heart. Because I'm wishing that I was the one to have a child with Jim. Not another woman - who selfishly took the baby and moved away.
I choose not to fault my husband for choices he made at age 23. And as much as I want to fault Caitlin's mother for not allowing Jim in the baby's life, I cannot because I don't really know her side of the story. And...
...when all is said and done, it wouldn't be very Christian of me to fault either of them, now would it (why? because I'm not perfect either).
So I find myself "setting aside my feelings", "putting on a smile", and doing what any good wife should do - support my husband Jim while he goes through the process of meeting Caitlin, learning about who she is and taking one step at a time towards this new relationship.
Jump forward to April 14, 2007 - and so a new chapter in our lives opens...
As I close this "out of body experience" blog (finding myself wishing this wasn't happening to me) - I ask for your prayers as we find our way as a couple and as Jim finds his place in Caitlin's life.
P.S. And just for now - please don't ask me about the situation. It took a lot to put it in my Blog and I need more time to let this all sink in. Please pray for me.
1 comment:
OMG! When you share news, you don't hold back do you! I have to tell you though, before I was even done reading I was reaching for the phone to call you. Then I saw your request and put the phone down. So no phone hug for you right now, but please know, friend, that I am sending hugs and prayers your way. My second thought, after "OMG" was one of joy for all of you. I can't explain it, other than to say that my heart feels that this will be a positive experience for all of you.
I have just too much to say right now, so I will continue in a private email to you.
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